Relationship struggles.

Hello!!! I know i know i know, lack of updates as usual even though the rule is to post once every 1 or 2 weeks.

I've been using up all my brain juices about this topic, not because I refuse to open up but because it is a very subjective kind of topic. What ben and i felt as a struggle in the relationship, might not be one in yours. And also, I didn't want what I have posted to not be relatable for most of you. Hence, this topic has taken up so much of my time and of course, i have other commitments.

But without further-a-do, lets go >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Commitments

When both of you go to a different school after secondary school or etc, the workload given to you by that school is definitely going to be different from the workload given to your partner. You might be given a project or assignment which requires more time to complete than the amount of time he or she needs to complete his or hers.

If the workload and time required to complete it are very different, it's going to be very hard to squeeze out free time for the girlfriend or boyfriend duties, especially when either one of you belongs to a more clingy type.

I'm not trying to say or imply that being clingy is not good for a relationship or that having a clingy partner is not good but you have to let them know that your commitments for other activities such as schools, CCAs and etc are very heavy, you will not really have time for them and you would like them to understand and trust you blablabla.

If he or she cannot understand or trust you that you have heavy commitments, cannot understand your reasons whenever you push away or reject meetings or dates with them, it is going to be a potential struggle in the relationship which might or might not cause you to lose the relationship.
So it's really important to manage your time well, manage your commitments well, have a good talk with your partner about your heavy commitments and to seek for their understanding. 💗🎊

Trust

As mentioned above, trust is also needed to aid your commitment struggle in the relationship but there is also another part related to trust which I think most of y'all are already familiar with.

- Trust your partner to only have his or her heart for you
When the both of you go to different schools, its unavoidable for him or her to make friends with the opposite gender. And I know its very hard to trust that your partner will not change for another person, but just ask yourself if you don't trust him or her to only have eyes for you then why do you even be together with that person in the first place because relationship is all about trust. 

And of course, there will be things like "Oh, its not I don't trust him or her, I just don't trust the person that he or she is making friends with." Then I'm sorry to let you know that he or she is not your puppet for you to control which friends he or she should mix around with in order for you to feel secure about your own partner. Because relationship is not an one-man show, it doesn't take place on its own. It needs two hands to clap. If your partner really ended up being with that friend, then you earned yourself a lesson that you trusted on the wrong one.

My main point here is that you cannot possibly stop everyone from getting close or befriending your partner, you have to trust your partner for him or her to not fall in love with someone else. 💏

Personality differences

The main factor of the struggles in any relationship will definitely be the personality differences. Personality differences are the preferences of each individual such as soft or loud music, likes to go out or to stay at home, spendthrift or savvy etc etc. And when 2 people of the different personality come together, they are bound to be a lot of struggles and conflicts in the relationship, especially if both of the partners tend to be hot-headed.

This is the reason for most of my relationship arguments with ben because I am more of a going-out type of person while he is more of staying at home and I tend to want my freedom in the relationship such as like I am totally fine about not meeting each other for a week or like spending 1 or 2 days in a week while he is more of a "i-want-to-see-you-whenever-you-are-free" type of person, basically like he just prefers to spend a lot of alone time together.

But the thing is that there is no perfect solution for this struggle because you just have to accept the fact that not everyone thinks and wants the same as you do and I would say that compromising is very important in the relationship. 👸🏼👱🏼💕

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There are going to be a lot more struggles than I have stated here. Some of the struggles here may or may not be a problem for you because its really really a subjective matter. So as usual, I hope you have learnt or are inspired a little some some in this post! 🐾

For those who are in a relationship, please last long and cherish your partners well while for those who are not, keep your heads up and let love find you. 💫🎈

thank you for reading ~ 

Upcoming post: How I prepare for School

Hopefully: 2nd April x

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